'My boyfriend is very cheap and eats more than me. He's always eating my meals and I hate it.' UPDATED
"My boyfriend is very cheap and eats a lot more than me. He's always eating my meals and I am starting to hate eating with him on restaurants."
My BF and me have been dating for 7 months and for special days and parties we had dinner or ordered on McDonald's, Taco Bell...fast food. All of these times he took food from my meals without asking. And if he offers food is once and very little portions, while he takes food from my plate like the whole time.
He rarely pays for special occasions and when I pay his meals he takes the most expensive meal (XL portions), even like this, he keeps taking food from my meal every time. For Christmas we had dinner on an Italian restaurant and he ordered ravioli with 4 cheese sauce and carbonara pizza. The pizza was so big and he only shared half of a piece.
I orderer a kind of meat pie with salad and he literally ate half of my meat pie and all of the olives from the salad without asking me. When the waiter brought our desserts, I went to the bathroom for a moment and you know what? When I came I found that he was "tasting" my coffee ice cream. And he didn't let me taste his dessert because "he was so hungry."
He didn't pay for his meal, I payed for everything because he suddenly forgot his credit card in home. He said he would give me the money later and I am still waiting for the money. He wonders why I am so tiny and why he is chubby... I am thinking about dump him because I think he's laughing at my face and he's a money digger. Should I talk to him or just dump him? He ended with my patience.
Not only about the food. In addition I must say that he didn't get me anything for Christmas excusing himself with "I don't have enough money," I bought him a computer keyboard with neon lights as he wanted and he has not even been able to write a romantic letter wishing me merry Christmas. Nothing.
Here's what people had to say to OP:
[deleted]:
This guy is taking advantage of you. It’s easy to downplay because “it’s just food” but I think this behavior signifies more: he is happy to have you suffer if it means he saves money. He is selfish and this kind of behavior is deal breaker to me.
And it’s not just food. No Christmas gift for her, but happy to receive one. He must have some money saved from not paying for meals.
If he’s constantly eating your food and it’s upsetting you this much, I’d dump him.
I dated someone who was like this for a couple of weeks, it got to the point where I would ask for separate checks and left them to pay on their own. He got mad at me for ‘being inconsiderate’ and was dumped on the spot. You deserve better.
I went on a few dates with a guy who was super adamant about us paying our own way...fourth date, we went out for a nice dinner and he offered to pay. Then got upset that I accepted? Dude, I was totally happy to pay for myself, but don't offer if you don't mean it??? (He let me pay for ice cream on an unfortunate fifth date without saying a peep...it didn't last after that. AH was rich and I wasn't.)
A day later, OP shared an update:
Update: I dumped him via chat. I don't want to waste more money on someone who doesn't care for me. I appreciate all of your comments and advice. I already talked to him about this and all of his replies were excuses about not having money and saving money for a console while he was taking advantage of me...this is over. Thank you all. If I knew before, the first time I wouldn't dated him.
Here's what people had to say to OP's update:
This guy sounds a lot like one of my (thankfully, not blood-related) uncles. How he doesn't weigh 800 lbs we don't know, because the man eats like a black hole. He will also order the biggest thing on the menu and never, ever pays.
There are never any leftovers at family meals and he'll watch every bite that goes into everyone's mouths until he's given the go-ahead to finish off the rest.
(I've been told that his mother used to have to physically take the serving dishes away from the table to get him to stop eating thirds and fourths etc as a kid.)
Does this dude have a tapeworm or something?! How can he even eat that much food?
This sounds like my brother. If someone else is paying then he's going to go XL on everything. If he's paying then he's not hungry and will have something when he gets home.
He has money, he just thinks that every penny in someone else's pocket is a penny that should be in his and will stuff himself silly at someone else's expense so he doesn't have to part with any of his preciousssss pennies by having to buy any food at all.
Maybe it's because I'm petty, but I woulda ordered food that he hates. Or barely anything at all. Low spice tolerance? Spicy like hell! Hungry? Oh, sorry. I'm on a diet and I'm only having water. Curious to see if he'd initiate the breakup, and what reason he'd come up with.
The joy of having tap to pay on your phone is that "I left my credit card at home" stops being an excuse.