'AITA for being upset with my 23-year-old daughter's 'birthday surprise?''
"AITA for being upset with my 23-year-old daughter's 'birthday surprise?'"
I've read lots of stories on this website, so I decided to make a throw-away account and see if I was in the wrong for my actions. I am newly 55, and my daughter, who is turning 23 in a few months, decided to "make me" something as a surprise.
She told me she was working on something for my birthday several months ago. I was pretty surprised since she's still in university and often complains to my wife about not having much money or time.
My birthday came, and she dropped by before my wife and I were going to leave for dinner. She gave me her switch and told me, "Play animal crossing. That's where my surprise is." I was a bit confused, but she just smiled and wished me a happy birthday before leaving.
We got home, and I picked up her Switch. I opened the animal crossing app and walked around. It was a large flat island decorated like a birthday party for a kid. Balloons and cake and all kinda of childish things around.
These weird animals walked past, and I tried talking to them but didn't say much besides wishing me a happy birthday randomly. I assume my daughter had a hand in this somehow since her birthday isn't for a few months, and she mentioned her "villagers" celebrating her birthday during 2020, making her happy.
She came by a few days later to pick up her Switch and asked what I thought of the gift. And I told her I was confused. It looked like a kids birthday more than one for an adult man with a wife and a kid in college. She looked upset, but she didn't say anything. She took her Switch back and said shed talk to me later.
My wife said I was ungrateful, but I told her there wasn't much to be grateful for since there wasn't anything really for me. She called me an ahole but I do not see how I am?
Here's what people had to say to OP:
keesouth said:
She basically created a digital birthday card for you. I can understand if you didn't immediately get it but I think you could have talked to her about it or asked questions before just poo-pooing the idea. YTA.
OriginalBaldMonk said:
Ah, one of those "I can't comprehend the effort, therefore there was none" kinda people eh? I don't think you can expect anything from your daughter next year, so don't worry. YTA.
werebothsquidward said:
NTA. Idk what everyone in these comments is smoking. Gifts are about the receiver, not the giver. Who cares if your daughter is into Animal Crossing? You obviously are not. Why would she think this would be a good gift for you?
If she doesn’t have a lot of money and wanted to show she cared, she should have made something she thought you would appreciate, like a card that reflects your interest or something about who you are. Not put up a bunch of balloons on Animal Crossing when you clearly have no interest in it.
Chrysania83 said:
YTA. She worked hard on creating that for you and it would not have hurt you to say that it was cute. Instead, you just crushed her feelings.
Yalsas said:
If she doesn't have money or time, what did you really expect for a gift? It's not something you'd particularly love, but at least she made an effort and did something A lot of girls her age don't talk to their fathers at all All you had to say was "Thank you, that was nice." YTA.
Strange-Employee-520 said:
NTA. She's old enough to know that you don't play Animal Crossing, which makes it about what SHE likes. Gifts should be about what the recipient likes.